An Ellipsis...how 'bout that?

Your Score: ellipsis

You scored 46% Sociability and 70% Sophistication!

Your life can be difficult because of your insecurities, but you should know that it isn't your fault. YOU didn't ask to be thrown in around thirty times per page in every bodice-ripper on the shelf! Those who overuse you can kiss your . . . you know. You need to learn to hold your head high and glory in your solitude. You really do have excellent, scholarly tastes. You must never forget that your friend, the period, will be there to support you at the end of every sentence where you truly belong, and, if what is left out is as important as what is said, why, then you are as vital as the alphabet!

Link: The Which Punctuation Mark Are You Test written by Gazda on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

How NOT to Sell a Car

In an attempt to procure some means of gainful transportation, I've been prowling (among other things) Craigslist. I replied to a posting regrading an 01 VW Golf GTI, inquiring about mileage. This is the reply I received this morning:

Hi christy

If only miles can let you determine the quality of a vehicle , I don't know what could be 130k .
If you think that is too much then that's the end of it .If not let me know how could I be of assistance in showing you what a jewel that car is ?
Just to give you an idea I bought last summer a dodge grand caravan with 169k miles and I've been driving it since and today I am at 184k miles if you don't believe me I can show it to you .Meanwhile I do have a couple of freinds who own similar mini vans where they are the only owners since new and they have been thru hell with all kind of problems and at very low miles like 25 and 30 k miles with bad transmission and other sensors problems .
So If you think only miles think again .
Good luck and best regards

Dude, first of all, you misspelled my name. Considering it's in the header of the email, this is not smart.

Secondly, the mileage on a used/preowned vehicle is something that should be placed in the listing, right alongside the year, make and model, transmission, color, etc. It's a pertinent piece of information that helps determine the value of the car. It's not as if my email said, "So like, are the seats comfortable?" In that case, I'd actually deserve some attitude. But no, I asked a reasonable question that any potential buyer would ask.

Maybe the dude is having a bad day. Maybe he's in need of some quick cash and he's frustrated cuz everyone is overlooking the car because of the mileage. I have no idea. What I do know is that he won't get my money - and not because of the mileage on the car.

Condoms, O'Reilly, & Reframing - Oh my!

First, here's the new Trojan ad:



CBS and Fox have refused to air this ad, because (according a response Fox sent to Trojan) "Contraceptive advertising must stress health-related uses rather than the prevention of pregnancy"

That would explain all the birth control pill ads that stress shorter periods, less acne and the relief of premenstrual symptoms. Still doesn't help me with the erectile dysfunction medications though.

However, CBS is the network that won't show the United Church of Christ's ad differentiating its gay friendlyness from other denominations, but did show some ad about God being taken out of the constitution during the NCAA tourney. So I guess they get points for their intolerant consistency.

Bill O'Reilly had a segment on this topic, which you can watch here if you're interested. Frankly, I don't think O'Reilly has any great feeling on the matter, but felt the need to pander as much as possible because some of his viewers found it 'objectionable'. I applaud guest Peter Shankman, author and PR strategist, for pointing out the networks' hypocrisy in regards to programming yet refusing to air this ad.

I'll make the obvious point so you don't have to - Why is it acceptable for networks to air Coors ads with "Twins!" as the tagline, with all it implies, and the Superbowl (with all the kiddies watching) to air Go Daddy ads with blatant half-dressed women with fake boobs, not to mention the myriad ED ads, but yet depicting men in a bar as pigs (hi, truth in advertising much?) is objectionable?

Now on to the thinking portion of this post. Amanda Marcott has a great analysis of this ad, the so-called controversy, and an explanation of why modern day sexual behavior has become such a mess in the first place - "On pigs, basketball, frames and Music"

Interesting, no?

And by the way, if you want send a letter to CBS chief Les Moonves and Fox President Peter Ligouri and tell them what buttheads they are, you can do that here.

Scene from a Car Dealership...

In regards to a new car model debuting December 07:

Me: What kind of a name is that? (breaking into song) Meet George Jetson....his boy Elroy....

Ever-patient S.O.: Um, that would be Ast-ruh, not Ast-RO.

Car Shopping Sucks...

Let me tell you why:

1. New Cars are too expensive. They have far exceeded the rate of inflation, not to mention 'real' wages. Of course, considering how much money the executives of the car companies are raking in every year, I shouldn't be surprised.

2. I refuse to enter into a seven year loan to buy a fucking car. Cars are not investments. Cars are like blenders; you use them and they depreciate in value.

3. I have no need for an SUV. They are the symbols of why the rest of world hates America. I refuse to own one. Same with a mini-van or station wagon - the hounds don't take up THAT much room!

4. For some reason, everyone selling used cars seems to think that regardless of year, mileage, equipment or condition, all vehicles are within 1 to 2 grand in price, the Kelly Blue Book value be damned.

5. Newspapers & internet advertising is worthless. Most internet sites don't tell you when the listing was posted. So it could've been yesterday, a week or three months ago. No way to know.


6. While car dealerships are eager to put the listing online or in the paper or whatever, they are lacksidaisical about removing them. This means that, more often than not, the car you're interested in has been sold. If you're caught on the lot, then...

7. The salesperson won't let you go without a fight. I came her to look at a VW Beetle, what the hell makes you think I'd be interested in a Chevy Malibu?

8. There are simply certain car makes and models that will begin falling apart after so many miles, and no amount of propoganda will alter my opinion of this fact. Therefore, I simply refuse to entertain the idea of them.

9. I don't do manual transmission. I can - I simply won't.

10. Most cars are boring. They all look the same. They are not aesthetically pleasing. This is the reason witnesses say, "It was a dark sedan/light-colored van/dark SUV" and why all cops roll their eyes in frustration. They are simply interchangeable and that doesn't get it done for me.

So if you see me walking down the side of the road in the near future, have pity on me and offer me a ride.

Since We've Now Entered the Wedding Season...

http://www.slate.com/id/2167870/

Am I a party pooper, a man-hating feminazi, a critic of American conspicuous consumption, or maybe just interested in reducing the violence in Africa over these expensive baubles...

Stepping Outside Yourself...

I happened upon some feminist blogs recently (in a very strange fashion, from someone's signature line on a duran duran fan message board - oh the possible irony!) and I found this post, paraphrasing a conversation between a man and women regarding feminist writings, opinions, forums and the like, highly illuminating. Not just because of gender issues per se, but as a reflection of what we ALL should do when reading or listening to someone of a different religion, gender, ethnicity, nationality, race, socio-economic status or life experience. Remember that IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT US.

http://ilykadamen.blogspot.com/2007/03/occasionally-conversations-with-my-man.html

[update June 14 - Ilkya seems to have gone "private" with her blog, so I'm copying the post of the text here. Considering I picked up the link from a link on a different blog, I'm sure she won't mind. If she does, she can tell me, I'll kindly remove it]

He came home from the store this afternoon and asked, "So, what's new with the thread that never ends?"

"Oh, that's dead finally," I told him. "Turns out all I hadda do to kill it was talk about the topic in great wonky and laborious detail. I wish I'd realized that 600 comments ago."

"I thought the topic was how mean you all are."

"That's what they say . . . hey, there has been one new development: Pinko Punko dropped a link to I Blame the Patriarchy at Sadly, No!"

"Oh dear God."

"Pretty much, man, pretty much."

So later I had him read the thread at Twisty's, and he said, "I have a question."

"Shoot."

"Okay . . . I get that there's a culture on feminist blogs, and you read them all the time, you understand that culture, most of the time I'm even okay with it, but then sometimes . . . do you guys not realize how you sound?"

"Huh?"

"I mean, if someone who'd never really read Feministe just went over and all they read was that post of piny's--well, no, not so much that post, or even Feministe necessarily, but like, I can see how some of these guys get the idea that you all hate men. Because you're talking to the regulars, and the regulars know you don't hate men, but some new guy reading some of this stuff, he's going to be all, wait, what did I do? I didn't rape anybody, I never beat up a transsexual--"

"No, I get that," I interrupted him. "That's a lot like--like, I used to have the same reaction reading blogs by people of color. I'd see something like 'white people sure suck sometimes,' and I'd be all, 'Hey! Wait! Not all of us! Not me!' Even though I probably do suck as a white person sometimes--but I mean, I'd take it too personally."

"It's hard not to take it personally."

"It's not as hard if you move yourself out of the center of everything, though. That's what I finally got through my thick skull. It's not ABOUT me, always. And even if it is about me, so what? I'm not perfect. Why shouldn't I have to take some shit once in awhile? Heaven knows I dish enough out in a day. Would it kill me to get an attitude adjustment? Would it kill me to listen to someone unlike me for five minutes?"

"But if you aren't the problem," he argued, "It sucks to be treated like you're the problem. It's like being accused of something you didn't do."

"If I'm not the problem," I explained, "then why should I get invested in identifying with the problem? If the problem is some particular batch of white people, doing or saying shit I'd never in a million years do myself, why should I feel the need to put myself in their shoes? Just because they're white and I'm white? That's stupid. Like all the idiot white dudes who identify with the Duke lacrosse players--they don't even comprehend that unless they're just as wealthy and elite, which you know 95% of them aren't, the fucking lacrosse players would SPIT on them. They're ID-ing with the players, but I guarantee you the players aren't ID-ing with them."

"A lot of the guys written about on feminist blogs do things I would never do."

"Then don't identify with them. It's not about you! You stand to pee, they stand to pee, beyond that, what's the commonality?"

"That's why the argument you guys make that I like the best is that patriarchy screws men too."

"Well, it does," I agreed with him, "but I think why you like that argument so much is because then it's about you again. All's right with the universe. Man the sun, woman the earth."

"No, I've figured out that you guys don't like that, and I'm trying not to do that, I swear, but the way you express things sometimes, isn't it just making it easier for men to get defensive?"

"No," I said firmly, "What we aren't doing is taking care of them. Nurturing them. Putting their feelings first. Looking out for them, making things safe for them. We aren't making them the center. We're talking just the way we'd talk, the way we do talk, when y'all aren't around."

"And you know sometimes that gets ugly," I continued, "but the thing to do then is to remember: Everything else IS centered around y'all. Everything else--you guys got the talk radio to take care of you, the ESPN, the CNN, the New York Times, the advertising industry--you can't bask in all that adoration day in and day out and then pitch a fit because a handful of blogs on the internet don't recognize your awesomeness. Or I mean, you can pitch a fit, go right ahead, but it's not going to end with me bringing you your binky and kissing your forehead. It's going to end with my foot in your ass."

"But for a new guy--"

"For a new guy the best policy is to lurk, read, get a feel for the place, and just keep chanting: 'It's not about me. It's not about me. It is not about me.' Twisty even has an FAQ to help people out, but does anyone ever read it? Not the guys. They figure they already know everything important and no spinster aunt is going to tell THEM."

"I don't think I Blame the Patriarchy is where they should start out."

"Word. It says 'for advanced blamers only' on it for a reason. Twisty has the S.C.U.M. manifesto posted there, for crying out loud. I don't know what Pinko was thinking."

"You should have a beginner's blog."

"Periodically someone says as much, but that's a lot of work and boring to slog through if you already have some idea. I used to think a feminism 101 blog would be great, but anymore I'm like, 'No, you can take your ass to the library. Or take a women's studies class.' But you say that last one, it's like you suggested the dude go castrate himself."

"That's what I think I figured out--I shouldn't expect one of you to walk me through everything."

"Right. You don't get a tour guide. That costs extra."

"So now you know: This is why I mostly read sports blogs. I'm lazy, and I have enough homework as it is."

"To be honest with you," I confessed to him, "There are days I think sports blogs might be the way to go myself."

What if the Post Office Had Competition?

Kimmie sent me the link to this very interesting article. When you read it, take a side gander at the Lysander Spooner hyperlink. VERY interesting! Makes you wonder what would happen if someone did that today....

http://www.lewrockwell.com/alston/alston21.html

Quiz-arama

I really don't know why I do these things. Curiosity, I suppose. The same reason folks read their daily horoscope...

Men See You As Playful

Men want a challenge and you are the perfect playmateYou know how to push men's buttons and attract a wide range of guysYou enjoy living and loving - it's one of your most attractive qualitiesMen are often consumed with desire for you, and you love that!

How Do Men See You?

The Klosterman Effect

I'm just now reading Chuck's collection sex, drugs, and cocoa puffs despite the fact he was the music writer for my local paper until 2002, when he moved to NYC, joined Spin, Esquire and host of other nationally recognized publications.

I read Chuck's articles during his tenure in Akron, Ohio but I don't recall harboring any fascination or strong opinion about the man. This is partially a symptom of not knowing what you've got until it's gone (because the doofus they replaced him with hasn't a CLUE), but mostly it's about being an Ohioan.

Rumors, stereotypes and outright lies abound, but one thing is true – we here in the Buckeye state have an incredible self-esteem problem. In the kindest of terms, we have very little in the way of pretension and regard most everyone as we regard ourselves – average folks living average lives, just trying to do the best we can. In this respect, Klosterman was one of us (I mean, look at him!), and therefore, I never considered he'd go on to author four books and preside over some of the most profitable publications on the local magazine rack.

This opinion was never about his ability per se, because there are oodles of talented people living in the Midwest, but more about the larger country's attitude toward those of us in the heartland. It all becomes about the east and west coasts, despite their minority-held lifestyles and values, so how the hell does some geek from North Dakota by way of Akron, Ohio become a cult figure to many Gen X-ers (and even Gen Y-ers, if there is such a thing)? Yet he has, despite all probabilities.

Am I a member of the Church of Klosterman? Not really. But I find the phenomenon of him interesting in the same way Grissom on CSI cherishes his bugs. Those that adore him, those that abhor him, they all harbor equal intensity but in opposite directions. And I wonder about a guy who can provoke such emotions. What does it say about our society when that much acrimony is spent on a dude known for waxing poetic about heavy metal, "Saved by the Bell", Lloyd Dobler and the Dixie Chicks?

It's no wonder the world is in trouble.